Myopic-My New Favorite Word

Yesterday, today, everyday has been just a living Hell for myself. I can't tolerate my living situation. I don't enjoy my job as much as I used to. My friends(most of them) are just shells of what they used to be or mutated versions of something worse then what they are. I hate to sound like a broken record, but it just befuddles me how much 'wrong' I see in the world now. All of the negatives, none of the positives. And I have the perfect word to define my Hell...MYOPIC.

my⋅op⋅ic 

–adjective

1.
Ophthalmology. pertaining to or having myopia; nearsighted.
2.
unable or unwilling to act prudently; shortsighted.
3.
lacking tolerance or understanding; narrow-minded.

Everyone, and everything has been myopic. Am I next??

FML, my favorite abbreviation for a 3 worded quote

Where do I even begin?

4 years ago I had the world in front of me. I was dangling it in front of my family and friends like it was the greatest toy in the world. But I took it for granted. Which is everyones story, I don't want to exclude anyone in the universe because I know we all share the same issues. But over time the world became smaller, and smaller for me to play with. I've made some decisions that I wish I could have judged better on. I've acted in ways I wish I could have had a better character for. Now I live on my emotions and unhealthy memories of the past that I wish I could re-do. I don't want to discount my privileges, for they are still better than what could have been a more negative situation that could have been offered.

For the few that read this, just know that I don't fight for what I want anymore like I used to. I haven't in a very long time. If there's anything that I would kill for right now in my life, it would be for MOTIVATION. As much as I desire it, I don't have that certain drive to just DO things.

When did my motivation leave?